Wednesday, August 6, 2014

This thing in my head!

Being bored has made me a better story teller.
Seriously. My mom use to tell me all the time that being bored builds character. Which is by far the worst thing to tell a child. For one, when you are seven years old, you don’t understand what the term character means. Even now, as a full grown adult child, I struggle with the true meaning of that word. But even less so does a kid get it.
The other reason why it’s dumb to tell a kid that is because it’s normally not true. The idea that, sitting around allows you to become your true self, is a stupid thing.  I am just starting to realize that who I really am, and yes I know it’s gonna sound a little new agey for a little bit, but who I truly am on the inside, is not what the world sees. I am something more, something greater.
There are seriously, only like two or maybe three people that have even stared to see who I really am. It’s crazy. The thought that what God has intended for me as a person, is only known by so few. Yet, I dedicate myself to being someone who can share my life with the world.
But who I am, is not a retail guy, or a guy that lives in a Mobil home on some random person’s lot. Who I am is not a person who struggles with everything in life, relationships, friendships, money, cars. Who I really am is so much more. I’m a story teller. I’m a writer (not that my grammar is amazing. Or that I have actually been published or anything.) I am a thinker, a talker, a comedian, a debater.  I am all these things, these are who I am. I just need a chance to show the world, that I can take care of my family, that I can achieve greatness.
That I can tell stories.

See, being bored, sitting on my butt and waiting for something to happen is not what builds character. It’s doing, it achieving, it’s fighting. Being bored is the symptom of laziness and allowing your life to pass by you. I was told once by a good friend and mentor, that God doesn’t change the lives of those who do nothing. It’s easier to turn a semi-truck when is in motion, than it is when it’s stationary. God will give you a path and you are meant to walk it. Whether it’s the right path or not, walk it. Because God (or if you are less incline to believe that figure: Fate, The universe, your natural instincts…) will move you in the right direction.
The Idea that Boredom creates a better you is idiotic! It’s backwards! Complete and utter insanity!
That being said… and as I stated before… being bored has made me a better Storyteller.    
So, I have this thing, I’m fairly certain of it, though it’s never been tested or diagnosed, called ADD. Seriously, as I get to know myself, and as others point out certain characteristics, I find that my “condition” in life is much like that of someone who struggles with ADD.  My Dad, throughout my collage years, told me that he could see I was a dreamer, I was ambitious, and because of that, I lacked focus. My Mother would tell me that I needed to spend more time getting certain things done, and not be so anxious about things to come. Ect… ect… ect…

Anyway, I deal with this ADD likeness, and so my brain moves from one subject to the next very quickly. Not that I think faster than a normal person. In fact, it takes quite a bit longer than most to think things through, probably because it’s so hard for me to focus on just one subject. But because of this, I come up with so many different things in my head very quickly. I can see connections in the characters that I want to write about, that allow me to put patterns together.
So I have a goal in my writing, to write about 18 different novels. 18 or 20, depending on how I feel, but still, about that much. Each novel being its own story and telling about the characters I want to project. Then having each novel be a part of a trilogy of novels, telling a larger story for more than just one or two characters, and finally the six different trilogies all coming together to tell a grand and epic story of nature and man.
The thing is, the points that I started to put all these things together was when I was at my broadest.  When I am do a job that is complete in its monotony, or a task that is pointless. When I drive and my mind is pulled away from the road, or sitting with nothing to think about. This is when I ponder on the stories of my life, and how I can convey them in an entertaining and epic way.  

But being bored is not what will make me a better person. While I believe that I couldn't find the stories to tell without the down times, I don’t believe that I should stay in that place. I am a semi-truck, and I just got done fueling up, now I’m on my way down the road, I just hope it’s the right one…

No comments:

Post a Comment