I want to be well known.
Not so I can feed in to my own vanity. I understand that, that might seem like a bit of a cliche but its not. There are two distinct reasons for my unnecessary desire to be known by strangers. The first being that I want to influence people in a good way and be a good role model to those who need one, as well and possibly in that same vain, I want to show society that a person can enjoy the world and still be a Christian.
Some would say that my goals and my aspirations would be that of self seeking pride, or of glory. That in order to seek fame and fortune one must by nature be a nihilist and selfish. To be able to make ones self known, you must first rid your self of morals and conservatives that make the modern man a true and honest person Just look at the realm in which our highest and most celebrated people act, they have taken the restraints of society and loosened them to further their own popularity. How could any simple man want to be know by strangers and still possible hold fast to the ideals of simplicity and good nature.
To me the answer is quite simple actually. The very idea that one holds fast to their ideals and morals makes them a prime candidate to be placed in a position of fame. Its the way I think that our political system should work, though it doesn't and that's a completely different blog. But the point being that I, myself, should be able to look for fame in showing the world my values. I should bet on my beliefs and my view points to help me succeed in the world. I don't believe that people should use them to hold me back, and strip me of my dreams.
To say, I hope that what I do with my writing and art and comedy and endeavors of any kind would be to help kids who are like how I was and help them grow in a way that is undamaging. I want to feed into the idea that we are all worth life, and that there is some how a glimmer of light in any dark that we might be facing. Though to be honest this is a message that a lot of artists and musicians have. From emo punk kids to directors and writers, they all have a shtick of helping people work through something hard. While I applaud the heart of their message, I find it lacking.
The only true light that I have ever found in my life is that of Jesus Christ. DON'T WORRY, this is not a sermon. I'm not going to go off on the nature and truth that is the living God taking on flesh and dieing for all of mankind's sins. I'm simply stating what I have found to be the light that others have, in my life, said that I should hold onto. While they tell me that, I'm not sure what it is that they have taken a hold of to be able to relay that message.
So now I say I want to be well known so that some random kid out there can see my work and find in him/herself a desire to do something for some reason. I think back to meeting a few of my personal "Heroes". Some of them I think on fondly, allowing me to wish even more to be like that person. As for others I think of how star struck I was, and how awkward I end up being. To those That I have done that to, I'm immensely sorry and I hope that one day I get a chance to ask your forgiveness. But I look at these people and something inside me stirs, something finds joy in their accomplishments. It's like jealously, its like envy , but it's also like mentor-ship, like trail blazing. Its Inspiration.
This is the exact feeling that I want others to feel when I do something. I want what I write, say, do and think to inspire young people to take action and take control of their lives. That is not a bad thing, to any person out in the world, the idea of inspiration is not bad. so why is it wrong for me to dream that one day I become known enough to influence people from distance. It is the whole idea of Christianity to help those we don't know, and I honestly hope that one day I can do that.
Finally and like I said earlier, probably along the same vain as wanting to influence people, I want to show the world that the Bible is a great place to find inspiration for art. Walking a christian life is a line that requires a lot of balance. Often, Christians find themselves living it two separate worlds, their Sunday "Christ like" world and their "normal" world. I find this ridiculous. I will not jump from side to side of a single broadening line. Instead I will let my art and my skills and abilities speak to the Christ like person I try to be. There is a movement in the world, that a work of art is an extension of a person's thoughts and beliefs. While I admit that its not a new movement, and that people have been a part of it for hundreds of years, It's still something that I must make myself apart of. Its something that I hope I can help young Christians see, and help them live it.
In everything I do, I wish to show that God is not out dated, nor is he non existent and that he is always working, always trying to produce in us a better person. Again, this is not a sermon., so I will simply end with this. I don't want to convert the people of the world, no do I want to shove my beliefs down their throat, but I have been inspired to show the world my light, my joy. So I want to be well known, so that all that I stand for, all that I do believe is, along with me, well known. In the end, I pray that Truth will reveal itself, and in everything that I will give someone out there hope.
T.W. Clawson
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